Radcliffe D. Walker

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Radcliffe D. Walker

Post by Guest on Wed Aug 19, 2015 11:26 pm

World:World POWERS

PROFILE
Name: Radcliffe D. Walker
Alias:

  • Storm Viper: Grenadier Form (Battle Name; preferred; sometime shortened to 'Storm Viper'; Comes from Project Storm Viper)
  • Little Harbinger (affectionate nickname given to him by his parents)
  • Chair Demon (By his 'sister', Rachael.)

Gender: Male
Race: Cyborg (Originally Human)
Date of Birth: June 28
Age: 15
Birthplace: Toronto, Province of Ontario, Canada
Height: 240cm (7'10.5")
Weight: 550kg (1,212.5 lbs)
Blood type: UNKNOWN Test Solution
Eyes: Red pupils with black sclera
Hair: Black with white streaks

PERSONAL STATUS
Position: Student at Tyler Jacobson Academy
Class: Valiant Class
Status: Active
Hobbies: Reading mystery novels and napping in trees
Likes: Tinkering with machinery
Dislikes: People who berate others due to their upbringing or power(s).
Catchphrase: "No, I'm not using the Solid Eye..."
Image Song: Electric Eye (Judas Priest Cover) - As I Lay Dying
Storm Viper: Grenadier Form Battle Image Song: Big Blast Sonic - Daisuke Ishiwatari - Guilty Gear Xrd -SIGN- Original Soundtrack

Appearance:
Radcliffe is massive in stature, standing just less than 8 feet, and has a body which is lean but has muscles bulging out of each and every corner which isn't covered in clothing.  He has spiky black hair which points upwards, possessing white streaks. He wears black goggles on his eyes, something he uses to hide the fact that his eyes don't look human at all. He wears a dark red-coloured sleeveless top underneath a white lab coat with black trim. He wears a pair of camouflage trousers which are coloured different shades of red and a pair of black steel-toed combat boots.

BACKSTORY:

Born to a pair of leading scientists on the forefront of cyber bio-technology, Radcliffe grew up with a weapons developer of a father and a medical scientist of a mother. Living in Toronto, where they both worked, he was encouraged by his parents to read books, instead of sitting in front of the television as he would as a child. After a while of rebelling against the idea, he picked his first book, and was overwhelmed by how it stimulated his mind. He could see, head and feel the vividness of his emotions being connected to his imagination, and from then on, became a very avid, both in fiction and non-fiction. The only place you could really find him was stick with his nose in a book.

Bullied throughout elementary school for his above-average intelligence, observations and high test scores, he would constantly take the beatings against him by the school bullies without a word, still powering through his school life of loneliness, and transferring schools twice before he fought back against his bullies, either with his nose in a book or sitting next to a stereo system, listening to classic rock or any other music with a modern classic taste to it on the radio. He knew he was better at blending into the background and sneaking around to keep himself hidden from those who bullied him, and for a few years, he was content with that.

It was in his last year of elementary school that his mother became a housewife and began working as a medical consultant from home. It was also at this time that Radcliffe gained his huge resentment against the entire world, slowly giving in to his dark desires day after day. He knew that even though he was just a normal child who could have it worse off, he couldn't bring himself to like something that hated him.

One day, during his pre-emptive sneaking away after class, just as the teacher was leaving, one of the bullies caught up to him and began shoving him while laughing at him for being a teacher’s. As he fell to the floor, something in Radcliffe ignited his anger, and in an outburst, he picked up the nearest chair he was sitting on and mercilessly beat his bully with it, heavily injuring them in the process. Shunning the world, becoming serious and only driven to follow in his father’s footsteps of creating weaponry, he had became a lot more stoic and professional with his relationships with others, choosing to befriend those also shunned like himself, and despised those would step on others to make themselves feel better, but ultimately would rather stick his nose into one of his many books with his small black headphones on, whether reading his study books or just his own fiction ones.

Going into a public science-orientated middle school, because of the incident that occurred in the past, he was forcefully paired up with a girl, by the name of Rachael, who would 'watch over him, overseeing his every move in school', so that no incidents would occur and stopping anyone who would try to bully him. He would push aside her many, many advances to make friends, only calling her ‘Rabbit’, due to her love for rabbit-themed merchandise. He began to take great pride in his intelligence, becoming a self-proclaimed genius in mechanics. He also had the ability to prove it too, being able to fix things alongside the janitor of that school, gaining the recognition of his teachers and some of his peers.

Radcliffe would begin to warm up Rachael after a day he witnessed her being bullied and pushing back the bullies  with a chair he threw out the second floor window (luckily not hitting anyone) to scare the female bullies away. That event is what earned him the name of the ‘Chair Demon’, a nickname used by Rachael to tease him for his affinity to throw chairs around (Something that Radcliffe would always retort with ‘It was the nearest object around’). He, for the first time, gained a friend and also his first love interest. Even though they tried dating, they both got to the point that their ideals weren't compatible and were better off as the close friends, or as they called each other their 'sibling’ and they found themselves to be more comfortable this way, with Radcliffe knowing Rachael was the only person who he could let his guard down around and not be judged.

His last year in middle school was an eventful one and what turned him into what he is now. During a science experiment at his science class, one of the faulty gas pipes burst, sending the invisible aroma through the entire lab. Evacuating their students, Radcliffe stayed behind to fix the leak himself, volunteering to plug the leak until the teachers came to block the room. Just as he opened the closed sliding metal door to the lab, it created a spark, which, incidentally, ignited the gas in air, burning him, which in turn ignited the gas in the pipes destroying the room, and with its foundations now in shambles, the entire south-wing of the science building collapsed falling onto the young boy’s head. Burned, mortally wounded and with no help looking like it would be on its way soon, he closed his eyes and smiled, promising himself on that last strand of hope that he would change himself to be more open and soften himself up to the world.

His parents, having found their son on his last string of life, began to rebuild Radcliffe to his former glory and more. Wanting to find a way to get closer to their hurt son, Radcliffe’s father began building his son's bionics and his mother began created different serums to infuse his blood with so that the liquid could power the bionic parts. Since his son had lost his arms, legs and most of his damaged torso, they gave him new body parts, knowing it was the only way to save him, and keep him alive to experience life in a new way; as a the first ‘Biotronic Mutant’ of his kind, both of them calling the Project ‘Storm Viper’.

Radcliffe awoke months after what had happened, finding himself to be alive and half rebuilt. At first he cried out of fear that he died, and went to a fear-induced rampage, injuring quite a few scientists and guards before he was fully subdued. After calming down and giving both his parents time and advice, surprising them both at his vast knowledge of machinery, Radcliffe bounced ideas and theories off of them, allowing his parents to rebuild him in record time. Assessing his body, Radcliffe found it a bother that he was mostly machine now, since it was stiff and heavy, but since his arms and leg joints were also machine, he didn't seem to mind if this was his fate.

He was now a metahuman.

His skin was slightly darker than his original skin tone, he needed glasses now to hide his rebuilt eyes and he would need to maintain his body every once in a while, but he went through it all, gaining information and using his parents’, specifically his father’s, machinery, to maintain himself. After some time of being tested, trained and pushing himself to his limit so his body functioned properly, Radcliffe stole his parents’ blueprints of his limbs and began upgrading another set of limbs to be sleeker and more efficient in design. He finally stole a blueprint of a prototype arm-mounted grenade launcher used by the military to take down metahumans. Deciding that the military and the government was the big bully, with the metahumans being the bullied, he decided to use their greatest weapon against them, and using his father’s machinery and his expertise, he developed the ‘Grenade ARMZ’, which was the process of upgrading the arms on the new set to quickly create small disk-like grenade which could be magnetized, to protect himself and the other metahumans. He also created small external drums to reload the weapons whenever they got depleted from the resources to construct the ‘Iron ‘Nades’ as he called them now. It was after finishing the drums that he replaced his current limbs with his new upgrades, and trained himself to fight, however poorly it was, and use his new weapons to his advantage, and he read up on a few books on how to defend himself, but ultimately, he was better equipped to fight than others to fight against the bullies who would try to take him down now. Using his former sneaking ability, added to his new 'talents' of combat and blowing things up, Radcliffe was now an espionage unit who could be feared, that is, when everyone knew who he was.

Surprised at how their son had gone behind their back, both his parents praised him by the way he was now acting by fully accepting his predicament as a metahuman, and this ignited his anger in him, and for the first task of him changing himself for himself, by shouting at both his parents. Going on about how he, in the past, wanted them to be persistent with their relationship with him, how he wanted to go into mechanics, and why he never tried to stand out from the crowd. After a few months of therapy for his new limbs, Radcliffe collapsed after a long day of 'training', going into extreme pain. Researching a bit into his ailment, he was given the diagnosis of the NETWIRE syndrome (Nerve-to-Wire Rejection Syndrome); a syndrome where the user of robotics, be it limbs or organs, is unable to use the nerve endings around the specific replaced part, and causing rejection, and ultimately, the death of the user if severe enough. His biological body fought back against his mechanical parts, and in turn, his parents would have to begin invading his own body with new 'parts', turning him more and more machine by the day. Luckily, his mother created a second serum to counteract this, but it wasn't a final solution; just something to slow it down. He was then taught more on how to protect himself, and this, being Radcliffe, he came up with his own fighting style to that he had the ability to completely access his 'Nades and attack in hand-to-hand combat all in one go, all of these as experiments of his parent's facility.

After leaving the facility he was built in, he was quickly apprehended by the police force for being a metahuman not under supervision. Calling his parents and telling them everything, they knew that the only way they could protect their son was to have him sent to Tyler Jacobson Academy to train in combat and be able to protect mankind as a metahuman hero instead.

Before going onto his journey to his new school, he went to find his ‘sister’ Rachael as the 'Cyborg', and was greeted by a tearful Rachael, who had tried to visit him in hospital, but wasn't allowed to. She held a party, inviting his peers from middle school, who had graduated, and greeted him well, accepting him back as their one-time hero.

His father, at the party, promised his son he would back him up to help him out with new parts and taught him his body's full assembly before letting him be taken to the school. Before he left, Radcliffe was given the codename by the lab of the "Storm Viper: Grenadier Form", while both his mother and father called him the "Little Harbinger", something to poke fun at his new form affectionately. Radcliffe made his mother buy him a tough lab-coat so that he can wear it reminding him of her, and as he had his father's machinery around him all the time, he changed his entire clothing style to that of a game character he saw once and liked, and began to smile a lot more. He also saw this opportunity as a fresh page to fill; he goes to Tyler Jacobson Academy as a new student, hoping to fulfil his needs as he slowly becomes the ‘Storm Viper: Grenadier Form’ – Storm Viper.

Powers:
His combat prowess matches if not exceeds his reputation in the Labs; his intelligence and Cyborg body not only adding to his collective arsenal, but the fact that he looks huge and slow, this belies the fact he is a lot faster then expected. His main strength, however, lies in his inhuman power, powerful defence and his ability to construct his "Iron 'Nades" quickly, small disk-like grenades, using his gauntlets, that can be timed and have their intensity increased or decreased to suit the purpose they were created for. His ability to sneak around in darkness or infiltrate places is his main staple, making him an espionage field agent, with his goal to work as spy.

Iron ‘Nade – The Iron Grenade. This disk-like explosive is used to destroy whatever it is placed upon. He can create small disks (about five centimetres in diameter) or large disks (from five to fifteen centimetres in diameter) using his only an arm or when his an arm is connected to a cylindrical drum for the former and latter respectively.

Personality:
Radcliffe is a serious, mature Cyborg. He is very calm and calculated, only engaging in violence when necessary. When fighting, Radcliffe can become fierce and determined, but will be quick to stop when victorious or no longer in danger. He is a solid, dependable soldier, a resourceful and reliable field agent and a passionate scientist and weapons mechanic. Relationships with his colleagues, both former and current, are both professional and amicable. He likes to test his underclass-men without reservation, and gives his open and honest opinion each time and the two have a relationship somewhat akin to an older brother with them. However, he is not beyond negative emotions. Though he tries to suppress his emotions to remain as serious as possible, a person can't really change who they really are. He expresses anger when he sees others being bullied and pushed around, criticizing both the bully and the bullied, telling those being shunned to stand up for themselves. He will then intervene if, and only if, things get out of hand, defending the weaker of the two. He is also very secretive, and will do things behind other people’s backs if he knows he will gain something out of it.


Last edited by Dentist Ryuu on Fri Aug 21, 2015 9:32 am; edited 5 times in total

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Re: Radcliffe D. Walker

Post by Raiden on Thu Aug 20, 2015 11:03 am

Very detailed profile! Though unfortunately I'm noticing some pretty big problems with it which may necessitate some major rewrites.

1. His ability (sweating nitroglycerin instead of water) makes no sense. Even leaving the rather speculative nature of it aside (I doubt there is a physical way to start sweating nitroglycerin after an in-utero injection, sci-fi universe or not), but any explosions he made would blow away parts of him. If he gives someone a high-five with a sweaty palm (and palms are always sweaty), that's his arm blown off. If a bead of sweat falls down from his forehead and onto his shirt, he's dead. Hell, since feet sweat so much, literally every step he makes would create an explosion strong enough to blow off his legs. Personally, I would advise you to get rid of this plot element entirely, especially since it has literally no bearing on his backstory - it's just there to be a cool superpower.

Dentist Ryuu wrote:Radcliffe picked up the chair he was sitting on and mercilessly beat his bully with it, heavily injuring them in the process, but not before finishing the bully off with a point blank explosion attack.

2. Holy fuckballs, he just killed that guy! He killed a little kid! And it wasn't, like, an accident or something like that, it was friggin' murder! There is absolutely NO way he'd be allowed to go to a "prestigious science school" after that stunt! The only place he's going is juvie at least until he turns 18. I mean, you do realize that he killed a guy, right? And someone actually assigned Rachel to protect him from bullies? Someone needs to protect bullies from him!!! Also, if they were in a "prestigious science school", would bullies even be an issue? I'd assume that while a public school would be more negligent when it comes to bullying, a more elite one would have a zero tolerance policy on that. And did I mention that he killed a guy in cold blood? Seriously, what the actual fuck? And this is NEVER brought up again! He doesn't even feel bad about it!

3. His transformation into a cyborg somehow changed him from an arrogant prick who pushes those closest to him away and kills people into someone nice who actively wants to help everyone and wants to go into medical school and be a doctor and stuff. I know that a near-death experience can give you some perspective, but this still made absolutely no sense to me.

4. He asked his father for weapons... Why? And his father said yes... Why? This is in your profile for literally NO reason other than to give him cool weapons he can use in fighting RPs. It doesn't make a lick of sense in context. Like, what is he even gonna do with those weapons! He wants to be a doctor, right? What kind of doctor carries around grenade launchers and shit? And the father, who knows that his son is VERY unstable, has killed a guy when pushed too far, and has just undergone the most traumatic event in his entire life which has changed him forever and stripped him of most of his humanity, actually thinks that it's a good idea to make him weapons? What?

5.
Dentist Ryuu wrote:Going on about how he, in the past, wanted them to be persistent with their relationship with him, how he wanted to go into medicine, and why he had tried to save his classmates.
An event where he has tried to save his classmates isn't mentioned anywhere on his profile at all. Unless I'm missing it, but I went over it twice and I don't think I am. Maybe you forgot something?

6. The Tyler Jacobson Academy isn't just some school that you can choose to send your kid to. It was founded recently and requires all metahumans under 18 (whether "natural" or "created") to attend. I think you should reflect that in your backstory.

7. You forgot to pick a class for him. Please view this thread and pick the one that's most appropriate for him.

8. On his personality, you say that he's "serious and mature", and literally a sentence later you say that he's "taunting his opponents when fighting". So is he serious or not? Please try to keep his personality consistent. Also, I think you should mention that he learned how to be a scientist and weapons mechanic in science school - I figured it out, but you should make it clear in the backstory just in case.

9. While I didn't spot a lot of spelling errors, there's lots of sentences that either don't make sense or could be reworded to sound better. Proof-read your profile before submitting it. If you can't find anything, I'll ask Mootking to take a look and let you know, but some of them are pretty obvious.

Please bump this thread when you've made the required changes and I'll take another look.
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Re: Radcliffe D. Walker

Post by Guest on Thu Aug 20, 2015 12:51 pm

First off let me say something:

Raiden wrote:And did I mention that he killed a guy in cold blood? Seriously, what the actual fuck?

I laughed my shit off at that. I didn't even find it advice for the whole thing. I. Just. Laughed.

... Well. I need to see a doctor. But anyway, that was why Dexter Minami was in a stalemate back at the old site, Raiden. Most of the old back story was his.

Anyhow, I rebooted the idea, took away what was unnecessary, and for the record, I didn't change it because you told me, but because I stayed up until 3 am writing it and i was pretty much out of my mind. xD
So, yeah. Recheck!

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Re: Radcliffe D. Walker

Post by Guest on Fri Aug 21, 2015 9:58 pm

Bumping post

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Re: Radcliffe D. Walker

Post by Raiden on Sat Aug 22, 2015 10:43 am

A few more things:

1. You say that he constantly let himself be bullied, and in the very next sentence you say that he fought back. Which is it? If he fought back, why is him beating the bully with a chair such a big deal? And on that note, how was he ever allowed to stay in that science school after throwing a chair through a window and aiming at people? Even at a public school he'd be chased straight out of there after a stunt like that.

2. "From this day on I will change myself! I will no longer fight, I will instead be open and soften myself to the world! Now let me just build some weapons of mass destruction!"

You seriously don't see a problem with this? I mean, why would he ever put grenade launchers in his arms? This doesn't make a lick of sense to me.

3. I don't think they'd arrest him for being a "metahuman not under supervision", especially if he didn't cause any trouble. And even if he was arrested, why did they let him go immediately afterwards so that he could have his party?

4. Typos. Proofread your post, as especially in the first half there were quite a few.

Also, please don't bump your threads. We'll get to it when we can. I've got a full-time job and Mootking is a university student. Sometimes I've got enough time to chat or respond to a post, but not enough to check a profile (which takes a lot longer than you might think). Sometimes I don't have enough time to respond to anything. Sometimes I'm just casually browsing. I haven't forgotten about any of my threads, or the profiles waiting on me, so there's no need for you to remind me with bumps.
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Re: Radcliffe D. Walker

Post by Raiden on Sun Aug 23, 2015 12:04 pm

Character denied due to account deactivation.
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